TMS Discussion: Dissecting the Infamous 'G' Word
(BMI / via discogs.com)
Many, many years ago, when I was a college underclassman, I lived and breathed classic rock. There was no music genre on my speakers or headphones more than music from the mid-1960s to mid-1980s. I would go as far as to say I paid attention to music, and to a lesser extent pop culture, from that era more than anything going on in the late 2000s, including film. Even now, I think classic rock is still my most listened to genre, despite other eras expanding to my playlists. My obsession with the hits, classics and legends from mid-20th century music quickly expanded to all of the history, trivia, mythos, and general atmosphere of the period. But in no time at all, my fascination grew from not only fangirling over bands like the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, the Who, Fleetwood Mac, Jefferson Airplane, etc.; but also learning about the women who were present for all of these iconic moments and events. AKA, ‘the groupies.’
(via blogspot.com / tumblr.com)
I ended up turning into an encyclopedia on these infamous young women, but the ladies I really found intriguing were the legitimate wives and girlfriends of the rockstars. Women like Pattie Boyd, Jane Asher, Anita Pallenberg, Marianne Faithfull, and Rosanna Arquette, who all had their own successful, professional careers and were also involved with cool, talented musicians. In Pattie’s and Anita’s cases, they were popular fashion models; Jane and Rosanna were screen & stage actresses from showbiz families; and Marianne was a relevant popstar herself. While being a part of the Hollywood and London circles, they also got to live up the perks of rock & roll—such as concerts, parties, constant traveling, and various VIP privileges—as a bonus. But the real holy grail of being the girlfriend of a music artist is direct inspiration of a good song. Pattie is in history as the basis of Eric Clapton’s classic ‘Layla’ on the 1970 album ‘Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs’ by Derek & the Dominos; Toto named their 1982 hit song ‘Rosanna’ after the actress; and many a Paul McCartney penned Beatles tune from the 1960s was inspired by Jane. Even music artists like Marianne, Stevie Nicks, Linda Ronstadt and Courtney Love influenced their boyfriends’ and husbands’ songs. This all sounded amazing when I was 19 years old. Almost like a real-life, modern fairytale. But with over a decade’s worth of maturity, experience and wisdom, I’ve become more aware of how naïve this mentality is. Not only because musicians are notoriously inept at committing to relationships, but the wives and girlfriends aren’t even around for a lot of the touring and backstage activities—the groupies are. There’s also been a dialogue in more recent years on how thankless the ‘muse’ title is since at the end of the day, it’s the artist receiving all the credit for the art and not the inspiration. Yet, it’s still the wives and girlfriends who are getting all the pretty love ballads and salty break-up songs out of these guys. So what’s the appeal of being a groupie if you’re considered second fiddle?
(via pinterest.com)
Let’s start with what a groupie actually is. The word has existed for going on 60 years, and with many iterations. Historically, there appear to be two different types of women identified as the label. The chick who is strictly interested in the sex and drugs, has no expectations of getting serious with these men and just wants a long list of conquests to brag about [i.e. Barbara Cope and Connie Hamzy]. The other is the girl who goes from musician to musician to musician desperately hoping one of them will eventually propose [i.e. Pamela des Barres and Bebe Buell]. When I first read Pamela’s notorious 1987 memoir I’m with the Band as a college sophomore, I didn’t really think much of it at the time and thought she was sort of annoying and immature. I mostly checked it out because it was the height of my Led Zeppelin kick when I had a crush on [young] Jimmy Page and kept hearing that Pamela mentions him a lot in her books. Well, she does constantly mention him and his bandmate Robert Plant as well as all the concerts and events she went to with them, and regularly describes how talented, charming and handsome Jimmy was. But she never goes into deep detail on any romance or really even sex in the book. Same for the dozens of other men she swoons and fauns over every page. It’s actually more tame than salacious in that regard. Revisiting IWTB as an adult a couple years ago, I felt pity and frustration. Not only is the writing style juvenile, but Pamela truly seems to not see the difference between a crush, a boyfriend and a casual hook-up. Worst of all, the famous guys don’t seem to take their flings with her as seriously as she does, yet she’s still gasses them up and claims the ‘60s-‘70s were the best time ever. It’s also unfortunate Pamela blasély blames a lot of her problems and struggles on younger women, particularly the teenage girls who wound up replacing her and her groupie friends. She sounds willfully blind to the power imbalances between both men and women, and adults and teens.
(Michael Ochs Archives)
Fortunately, while reading Bebe’s own 2001 memoir Rebel Heart, there weren’t any cringe inducing reactions. Unfortunately, she’s rather conceited about her appearance and hypocritical regarding other women on the tours and backstage as if she wasn’t doing nearly the same thing. You can quickly see where this is going with these ladies’ stories. It’s pretty easy to spot which story or claim is BS and which is probably true if you’re paying attention to the groupies as much as the musicians. Whenever Bebe and Pamela are interviewed or post on social media, they want everyone to think they were important parts of classic rock and made an impact in the community without making music themselves. Pamela and her friends did actually make their own LP, ‘Permanent Damage,’ credited as the GTOs [Girls Together Outrageously], and produced by Frank Zappa and Lowell George in 1969. But if you look at the credits on the record sleeve, you’ll see the instruments are all played by men, a big chunk of the songs are co-credited to someone named Davy Jones [not to be confused with the Monkee] and about half of the album is just the girls rambling in freeform spoken word. Unsurprisingly, no one from the GTOs attempted careers in music after Frank lost interest in them only a year later.
(PDB)
Since these gals are still recognizable names in music fanbases all these years later, surely the artists themselves have seen them as a vital part of their lives, right? Well, kind of. A lot of the original classic rockers were sadly dead by the time the era was over, such as Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison, Gram Parsons, Keith Moon and Brian Jones. So we’ll never fully know their candid opinions on the scene. In I’m with the Band, Pamela begins the book naming Chris Hillman of the Byrds as ‘the love of her life,’ but by the middle Jimmy is suddenly her ‘dream man,’ and in the epilogue she calls TV star Don Johnson ‘the man I loved the most.’ Of these three men, Don is the only one who seems to still keep in touch with Pamela since their relationship in 1970-71. Jimmy famously referred to Pamela as a bimbo the year her book was released, which is also supposedly the last time she spoke to him. As far as I can find, Chris has never mentioned her publicly. You have to also wonder how the man Pamela was with the longest and the father of her son—ex-husband and actor-singer Michael Des Barres from 1977 to 1991—feels about her consistently listing three other men as her big loves too. Bebe, who was also a Playmate for the November 1974 issue of Playboy Magazine, actually does have big connections to pop culture though. Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler is the father of her daughter, model-actress Liv Tyler; and Bebe’s on-again/off-again boyfriend throughout the 1970s, singer-songwriter Todd Rundgren, is Liv’s stepfather. But beyond that, there aren’t many shoutouts to the groupies from the male perspective, save for a tongue-in-cheek novelty song once in a while. Most of the musicians who miraculously managed to settle down and completely outgrow the lifestyle want nothing to do with it now, especially the A-listers. The lesser knowns of the B-list and C-list seem to still be cool with keeping up with old groupies, particularly if they aren’t married with kids and grandkids. To me, it just comes off a little pathetic seeing Pamela make sure everyone remembers she spent time with respected superstars who won’t acknowledge her existence anymore, let alone return the sentiment.
(via twitter.com)
Ironically, the groupies who own up to the ‘slut’ stereotype, including Barbara and Connie, are the ones who aren’t giving any false impressions. On YouTube you can find old TV specials from the 1980s, like MTV’s Behind the Stage Door (1987), where many real groupies and relevant music stars comment on the culture. Connie and Barbara just straight up tell it like it is, that they would rather skip the heartache and just make the most of the moment. In a way, I can actually respect that kind of honesty and think it’s a lot less damaging compared to Pamela’s usual fluff about being supposedly adored by a bunch of men she didn’t date or live with.
So what exactly are the dynamics inside the music/groupie community anyway? Is it really as empowering as some of these ladies claim it is, with them allegedly having the upper hand most of the time? Does having casual sex with men you’re not in a relationship fit into the feminist scope? Honestly, I think the vast majority of the former groupies are wearing some dark rose-colored glasses; for a couple of reasons beyond the rockstars moving on and the groupies continuing to live in the past. One is that most of them seem to have only a very basic understanding on the politics of feminism. Pamela has stated in her later years she thinks she’s feminist because she didn’t settle on being a housewife and was doing “everything she wanted to do.” That’s a rather simplified perspective for someone who was in her early 20s while the 2nd wave movement was happening. Not to mention the fact that she’s said many times her dream was to be the wife of a famous musician.
(Richard Creamer)
Another thing that comes up frequently is the age factor. Back during the mid to late 1960s British Invasion period, the average groupie roughly ranged somewhere between 16-21 years old, while the musicians were around 18-23 years old. Completely fair game outside of how the famous young man could possibly take advantage of his celebrity status. But by the early 1970s, a definite change began happening in the rock scene. The guys got older, but the girls stayed the same age, or even younger. When I learned about ‘baby groupies’ in my early days as a classic rock fan, it didn’t have much of an affect on me since I was still a teenager myself. Now as an adult, I’m alarmed this kind of thing was barely hidden in major cities like LA, NYC and London. When it comes to famous teen groupies and girlfriends, the same five are always brought up: Sabel Starr, Lori Mattix, Morgana Welch, Julia Holcomb and Mandy Smith. Lori and Morgana don’t view their past experiences negatively and still speak flatteringly about those years today, while Julia and Mandy have gone the complete opposite route of wishing they hadn’t been involved with rockstars. In Julia’s case it’s former boyfriend Steven Tyler who was 25 when he asked out 16-year-old Julia in 1974. For Mandy, it’s Bill Wyman of the Rolling Stones, whom she met when she was 13 and married when she was 18 while he was in his 40s. Sabel sadly died of a brain tumor in 2009 and was a recluse for most of her adult life, even keeping her kids in the dark on her groupie history. She did participate in one, rare interview for the 1997 punk-rock book Please Kill Me, where she openly says she regrets most of the decisions she made in her teens; and exposes Johnny Thunders of the New York Dolls as a terrible boyfriend when she was 15-16 and he was 21-22 in 1973-74. She doesn’t call herself a victim, but it’s also clear her feelings about the culture evolved after she grew up.
(Ebet Roberts)
A bizarre part of this whole phenomenon is that the older groupies in their 20s didn’t judge the male musicians for becoming interested in high schoolers, but saw the young girls as competition or friends. Pamela was 25 when she realized her days as a top tier groupie were going to be over soon in 1973. In 1971, Don left her for 14-year-old future movie star Melanie Griffith and less than two years later, Jimmy ditched Pam for Lori when the latter was also 14. Rather than judge her lovers, Pamela practically describes both Melanie and Lori as tempting, pubescent seductresses in her first book. Bebe admits in Rebel Heart and PKM that she actually wanted to hang out with Sabel and Lori when they were at the same club or venue as her. You would think after the advent of #metoo and TimesUp more former groupies would start realizing how sketchy and questionable the culture is in retrospect. But nearly all of them have mostly distanced themselves from the movement, especially Pamela.
After the 1980s, it gets kind of hazy what happens to the groupie scene. From the stories I’ve read and heard, it sounds like the jailbait variety died down a little in the 1990s with grunge and BritPop, but then made a big jump again in the mid-2000s during the peak of emo/scene music. It’s also hard to tell what even goes on backstage and at clubs anymore since paparazzi and other photographers aren’t openly lurking around like they used to decades ago. These days I would really be totally fine with groupie culture being a thing of the past. Life experience, social media, and an endless amount of news stories on sexual misconduct in showbusiness has completely disillusioned the whole concept. I’m not convinced the sex, drugs and parties were good enough to make the degradation and humiliation worth it.