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Covering the Formula 1 from Monaco was always a highlight back when I reported on the sport full time for this newspaper. Granted, the race itself was invariably dull, as my colleague Oliver Brown pointed out in a particularly withering column. And in truth I was at least 30 years, maybe even 50 years, too late to experience the full Monte.
Stories of Stirling Moss waving at pretty girls while lapping the Principality, or dodgy deals cooked up at the Hotel de Paris, were as from another era. But they were all part of the pull. There is no denying the race itself has become a bit of a dud though. Lewis Hamilton summed up the Monaco paradox rather well this week when he described it as “the best venue, the most beautiful place we get to race at... but it is never exciting for fans.”
It invited the question, what would the perfect F1 weekend look like? Not only the best venue, but the best all-round experience. For what it’s worth, here’s my Fantasy F1 weekend:
Best circuit
Track architect Hermann Tilke actually tried to create the ‘perfect’ F1 track a few years ago with his Circuit of The Americas in Austin, Texas. He did a decent job, too (for once), incorporating Silverstone’s Maggotts-Becketts-Chapel sequence, the famous Senna Esses of Interlagos, Hockenheim’s arena bends, and even a replica of Istanbul’s Turn Eight, into a track that also features plenty of elevation changes. But for my money, Spa-Francorchamps can hardly be improved upon. The majesty of the Ardennes, the noise of the engines reverberating off the trees, Eau Rouge, Pouhon, those dark menacing storm clouds ready to burst at any point. Spa always produces a good race.
Best weather
I’m thinking Melbourne in March; sundowners on the beach in St Kilda. Monza in the early autumn sunshine. Monaco in May is pretty perfect too. But let’s be honest, races are invariably more interesting when there’s the threat of rain to spice up the action, so perhaps it’s Spa again.
Best atmosphere
This time Monza has to take it. Silverstone would be in the conversation. You cannot sniff at 140,000 fans on race day. And the concerts and the camping are fun (when it’s not bucketing down). Mansell-mania I only watched on TV. That must have been brilliant to experience live. But the passion of the Tifosi at Monza is infectious, particularly after a Ferrari victory, transforming the start-finish straight into a sea of red.
Best post-race
I always found places beginning with ‘M’ pretty reliable. Montreal was a perennial favourite, the jazz bars and the steakhouses. Monaco for the people-watching. If you could wangle an invitation on to a yacht so much the better, even if it was a cliche. Monza for the food and drink and aforementioned weather. Melbourne is a great city. Mokpo is the exception to the rule, the less said about its wet market or love motels the better.
A mash-up of Monaco, Monza, Silverstone, Spa and Suzuka then. With a night out in Montreal to follow. Of course, most of these observations only apply to those attending live. The vast majority of fans watch F1 on TV and for them the race itself is all-important, which is why the backlash against Monaco is always so severe. It’s all very well trying to convince viewers to appreciate the skill and concentration required to keep lapping Monte Carlo’s tight, twisting street circuit, knowing that the slightest error could see the driver bounce off a wall and into the harbour. But when each year the race passes with zero overtakes, it does make it that much harder to sell. Still, the trade-off is that qualifying in Monaco is always very high stakes. Maybe there’s another category for Fantasy F1 weekend.
Austin's track, Spa's rain and Monza's fans - what makes the perfect Formula One race?
The dream F1 experience - what would it look like? Not only the best venue, but the best all-round package. Here is my Fantasy F1 weekend